I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize