kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
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i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
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The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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