You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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