she sounds like chewbacca in bed
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
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It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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