oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
She needs sedatives and a leash
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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