Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize