i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize