apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize