I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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