We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize