Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
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