she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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