Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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