It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
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Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
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They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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