dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
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it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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