We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize