Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize