Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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