Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
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You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
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Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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