there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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