if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
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nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
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Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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