I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize