garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize