Buhtt sex?
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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