my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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