I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
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i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
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Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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