The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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