I just pynch a tree in the face
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize