that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Congratulations! We have a period
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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