Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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