I am puke
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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