i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
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My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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