I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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