I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize