I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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