Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
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I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
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we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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