Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
bring money and cleavage
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize