You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
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After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
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But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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