what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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