she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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