I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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