A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize