Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
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Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
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I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
wow bdsm is so cute
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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