I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
too bad you live with your parents still
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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