First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
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love makes seman taste better
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
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The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You pole danced in your parka.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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