You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
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You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
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Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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