And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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