I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize