Capitaan dildo arrescate!
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize