Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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